Making It Real

I have been doing a LOT of reading lately. I am trying to manifest abundance, regularly set and stick to intentions, and mostly, trusting the universe to break connections to my old life. I do not want to go back to the life I lived that was not really any sort of happy life.

Much easier to say than do. And, I'm a nerd. I don't like getting things wrong.

I know that I have to stay the course; what I feed, I create.

I want my healing business to succeed. I want people to feel safe enough to embrace the life that waits for them. I want the same for myself.

I want to be a published author. I want financial freedom so that I can live this life without the constant worry of money and making ends meet.

I am grateful for everything that the universe has already supplied to me to empower this vision.

I had a test of all of this last night. I have a practise healing session today, postponed from last Monday because I was exhausted after working in a school as well as with all of my clients. I also received two offers of casual work. I declined both, putting the healing session and my client first, even though I know she would understand if I had to postpone again.

I went to sleep debating whether I had made the right choice. My savings are gone. The only money I am bringing in is from my tutoring business. I use it for food, petrol, and in the next fortnight, it will have to pay all of my fortnightly bills too. This is overwhelming.

I woke up this morning at 7; the natural time my body wakes. But for work, I need to be up by 630. Interesting in itself. Work makes me go against my body's natural rhythms. I opened my emails, only one, and Reid Tracy's Hay House newsletter was there. He wrote that the distinction between dreamers and successful people, is that successful people take action. That's it, they take action.

I have chosen to interpret that, in line with feeding that which I want to see thrive, as having made the right decision. For today. I have been offered work later in the week; I have accepted that single day. It makes next week's target more do-able.

We shall see. Any which way, I'm about to learn a lesson lol.

Trusting is not easy. This is the first step.

Abundance?

There is enough for everyone.

I think I might finally be starting to believe this. It has taken me a week to process my Hay House Writers Workshop experience. And it was reading a blog piece by someone I met last weekend that has allowed the final piece for now to sit comfortably.

Since the success of my India experiment (answering the call, trusting I will be fine, being true to the experience, letting go of redundant labels like shy), I head in to each new experience with an infinite sense of trust and calm. I didn't know what to expect from the Writers Workshop so I chose to expect nothing; I answered the call and that was what I was supposed to do. That was enough.

I pre-booked my parking. I never do this. But I answered that call too. I missed the entrance. The GPS said I had arrived and did not reroute. I took a deep breath, and with logic and faith, I made my way back to the parking station. I lined myself up for a spot and a zippy car sped into it. I did a u-turn a little further down and came to park in another spare spot.

I tell you this because this run of events is usually so inconsequential in our lives that we do not pay any mind to them. As I tried to navigate myself to the Convention Centre, a lady asked if I was going to the Workshop. I said yes.

We started walking together, we registered, we sat together, we ate together, we met up for breakfast the next day, sat together, ate together, met new people together, had our books signed together, had photos together, and not ready to leave this 'new' friendship, had a drink after the workshop, together.

The conversation flowed easily and went deep almost immediately. Another of my tribe.

I have opened space in my life by jumping this year. As a result, I have given permission to myself to explore new things, meet new people, and move more fully into who I am. My heart has opened, my mind has opened, and I'm living with more conscious purpose than I have in a long time. So, it follows, my life has opened.

And, the real beauty in this, is that my old life (the parts that served me – friends, working with kids, healing, writing) are staying with me whilst I build my new life (taking what serves and leaving behind what doesn't serve me any longer). I feel so liberated.

I am struggling to break old connections. Teaching in schools for money is the greatest obstacle I face; that routine and that connection have been my life for over twenty four years. I am still working on manifesting financial freedom, but I think I just need to relax into it rather than focus on whether I have enough money all of the time.

And trust in abundance; there is enough for all of us.

Dr Ali Walker spoke at the workshop. She resonated for me. She had set her intention to become a Hay House author, put symbols on the fridge, focused entirely on it, and when Hay House rejected her manuscript, her life as she knew it, ended. The intention had not manifested and she was emotionally broken. Knowing her message was important, she started over, more relaxed, and Hay House has published her message.

I need to relax. I've set my intentions. I need to now release them for manifestation, in whatever way they will serve me best. I trust in this.

After all, there is enough for all of us.