I have arrived at my appointment early. No surprises. 37 minutes ago I was sitting on the lounge reconciling business accounts in my pyjamas and unshowered. Now, I’m showered, dressed and writing today’s blog waiting to go in.
The sky is interesting. Very black clouds ahead of me, blue sky beyond that, and the sun’s warmth burning my arm as I question why I’m wearing a cardigan. Seasons change, and regardless of the temperature, so does my wardrobe.
I have also worked on my poverty consciousness this morning. Interestingly, one thing that came up for me, which will probably sound very weird, is that I have kept myself poor because my perception is that people will expect less from me.
I can sort of work out where that might have come from. After my parents divorced, the perception was that my father was very wealthy and more was expected from him as a result. He was definitely better off financially than my mum who became a single Mum on benefits, but because of the contrast, the perception was that he was infinitely more wealthy.
I don’t know how true this is. It wasn’t my place to know. But the perceptions have impacted me.
Also, my perceptions regarding money connect to my sense of worth and value. These perceptions are a constant work in progress.
How quickly time moves …