I am watching Dolores Cannon talking about Quantum Healing Hypnosis after an intense day of Sound Healing study following a four day migraine where I mostly slept and listened to Game of Thrones (finally joining the club and yes, I love it).
I spoke about my healing sessions in the US with both Nancie and Suzanne. Nancie unlocked a few boxes, Suzanne unlocked different ones and provided me with a framework. My intent became to heal myself from everything that has unbalanced me at my soul level during my first forty six years. Just a small task 😳.
Anyway, Dolores said that if our brains are strong enough to let us get sick/make ourselves sick, then it is strong enough to heal us. Agreed. But, how. How do we heal ourselves?
First, we need to determine the root issue. This could include a past life trauma that needs to be resolved. Or just this life time’s traumas. Man, this voice is not wholly mine. Anyway, moving on after acknowledging that … the past life stuff is difficult. Dolores has passed but has trained many people in her practice. I’ve contacted one close to me to enquire about costs. I’ll have to save. I’m curious.
The only real knowledge I have of my past lives has come through recurring dreams. Persecuted for my beliefs in many of those. My last life though, I have been told, was lived in Brittany, France as a nun. As a child, I was obsessed with this part of France. And then, Gaugain’s Breton Girl. So, to me, this past life is plausible.
This life time’s trauma, whose, where do I start. Lol.
I start with the notion that all of this life time’s trauma was my conscious choice before birth (and yes, I do believe this). I have always accepted that I put my hand up for these lessons. Where I hadn’t extended that thought and idea, Suzanne helped me qualify. I was the CEO in my boardroom but I also existed as a participant in the boardrooms of others. I put my hand up to assist them in learning their lessons as much as I had them volunteer to teach me mine.
This was an ah-ha moment for me.
Our tribes enable and empower us to learn, as much as we enable and empower them to learn. The focus isn’t on the trauma but on the value of the lesson that we learn. This life I chose to be a victim as a child, to survive it and to release it (this part is a work in progress). But, I also chose to have power – as a teacher, as a friend, as a human.
I once victimised a spider. I am not proud of this. I was at my dad’s house and there was a huntsman. I’m really not proud of this. I took a can of bug spray and I sprayed it. It didn’t die quickly. I could have put it out of its misery, but I didn’t. I watched it die, mesmerised by its body in the throes of an excruciating death. It was only when I realised what I had done, and done callously, that I felt anything real and humane.
I don’t use bug spray and huntsmans are always welcome in my home. I learned. I felt the spider’s pain, and I decided to never inflict that callous disregard for life on anything again. I was already a vegetarian, which makes it worse. But I needed to learn that lesson.
Power is a great feeling. To have that control over something else is amazing. But, power abused causes you your own pain. Ultimately, victims and abusers all need to heal. Understanding the need for that power is possibly the key. Maybe I needed to empathise with my abusers. And, maybe not.
Today in one of the sessions I was struck by a thought. For a few weeks I have thought that I need to heal the feelings of betrayal arising from the acts of betrayal I endured as a child. Endured? Pfft. Suffered. The cyclical nature of healing hit me. Betrayal is how I felt and internalised the events but trust was the deeper issue, the flip side of you like.
So, as much as I work on resolving the notion of betrayal, I must do that in the light of trust. I need to trust that I chose my path, that the universe (or God or whatever you label the source) will provide the tools I need for learning, that it will never force me to endure more than I can, and that equally, the universe will provide me with the tools required for healing.
Seriously, if you’ve stick with me to now, you deserve a medal. I’m going to post and then re-read. It all makes sense in my head.