Little Gems

“When you feel inside yourself that it’s time to let something go, then it’s time to let it go,” Oprah on Dr Phil. 

What I miss most about Oprah’s talk show is the little life gems that would often come through. 

I remember watching her final show and realising the extent of the impact that her 25 years in television had actually made on me. I had been watching her since I was a teenager. Not obsessively like I did as an adult (I never do anything by halves, unfortunately) but through my dark times she was always there. I learned how to heal through Oprah; her authenticity and her compassion. 

She is one of my heroes. I respect her immensely. Rightly or wrongly. 

And today I woke up, after spending yesterday praying that my migraine would disappear, wishing someone would come along and hit me in the head repeatedly with a baseball bat. After hours of writhing in pain, I got out of bed and vomited repeatedly, crying the whole time. This is not my normal migraine time. I lay under covers on the lounge, eight mersyndol in five and a half hours not achieving as much as I’d hoped but enough that I can watch tv and the tears have stopped. 

And there is Oprah on Dr Phil after a hot shower that loosened my neck and back muscles. And allowed me to focus on why I have spent the entirety of my holidays exhausted and sick. 

I broke down in the last week of school. I was defeated and utterly shattered. Something happened about five months ago that legally I am not allowed to speak about or act on. Anyone that knows me, in life or through here, knows that I don’t cope well with binds and shackles. I find the act dishonest and it works against my core beliefs. And that is why I am exhausted and sick. Continually. 

At any rate one of the first gems came fifteen minutes in to the show, after the social niceties. It’s what opened this post. 

And it’s true. So I cried when I heard it. And it came from Oprah. And so I must listen. 

Change requires courage. 

A friend of mine is packing up her life to live her dream. I’m buoyed by that. It requires courage to do that. 

I’m on a two yearnings of moving forward and creating a happier life for myself. This is my resolution to that. My body is telling me it is time, my heart feels it too, now I will find the courage to embody the change. 

Thanks Oprah, again. 

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