When I had my miscarriage a couple of years ago, some of you may recall, I felt very betrayed by some friends disappearing when I needed them most. In hindsight some of my feelings, or some of the intensity at least, may have been due to the massive amounts of hormones in my system. And I accept that. Mostly.
As a result, I have tried to be more forthcoming with people. I have tried to open up, share my bad times, reach out, etcetera.
I am going through a rough patch at the moment. One day I will talk about it broadly. I can’t do that today. And it’s irrelevant really, except that I’ve had flashbacks to those yucky times of miscarriage.
I generally have a lot of friends. When people are sad or want help, I’m called. When I’m happy, people want to hang out and people touch base, etcetera. I know people are busy. I get that.
But I would have hoped that the people I have opened up to, in my sadness/despair/anxiety, would touch base with me now.
There are quite a few people who won’t be hearing from me again. Friendship needs to go both ways. So many of mine don’t.
Simply, I’m worth more.