Last week I posted about my weight loss aims for this year. A weird thing has happened; a series of signs/indicators.
I was resolute on changing my lifestyle. I started whilst on the cruise and after a six day migraine, I feel significantly better. Wholly better.
I don’t actually care about my weight.
This is a huge shift for me from previous attempts at losing weight.
I care about being healthy. And I think this is a significant shift in focus.
My Principal organised a free gelato bar at school for our first week back (yes, amazing gesture). I LOVE gelato. And I mean, love. If I could eat gelato all day every day I would be happy for life.
I didn’t have a single taste.
I knew that if I had one, I would find excuses to keep going. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not depriving myself of the foods I love to eat. I had chocolate yesterday.
I’m just selecting what I eat more carefully.
I know my danger foods, the foods that if I start eating, I keep eating. And in these early stages of modifying my lifestyle, these are real danger foods. Gelato, pasta, lollies, bread = danger for Tina.
I’m keeping stock of what I eat and I am aiming to eat more fruit and more vegetables than anything else. I am drinking more water. I am trying to eat earlier rather than later. I eat when I’m hungry. Thus far, I am mostly succeeding.
If I go out to eat, and my main isn’t the healthiest option, I won’t have dessert. I’m practicing the everything in moderation cliche. Thus far it is working.
I don’t know if I’ve lost weight. I don’t care if I’ve lost weight.
I feel better. I have more energy. My mind is clearer. I want to do more. I don’t feel heavy. I don’t feel weighted down. I feel genuinely happy. And I’m present.
I think this has been aided because I’m practicing what I gained from reading Daring Greatly and Rising Strong. I’m working on my attitudes more than anything. I acknowledge my emotions as I feel them. If they are negative I am tracing back to the core vulnerability and/or shame. And I am acknowledging that. Just doing that, has made me feel more emotionally still and balanced. This has allowed me to feel and be more present.
I’m embracing interaction. I’m moving forward.
I feel good.