I have received contact from Fostering Young Lives; about to confirm my appointment times throughout December and January for the continuation of the application process to become a foster carer.
And I am so nervous.
The unknown does that. Insert nervous giggle.
I am sure that I could be a good foster parent. I think I have resolved most of my issues as a human being. At least enough to make healthy decisions regarding parenting responsibilities.
I think I am nervous because whilst I feel I will be accepted as a carer, I know nothing beyond that. And there is always a fear that I could be a bad carer, that it will be way too hard, and that maybe I’m not ready to sacrifice the freedom of my life.
All big questions, and funnily enough, the same questions and fears I had throughout my IVF cycles if I became pregnant and carried successfully to term.
My logic says that the fears and questions are sensible, even healthy, and so if I am questioning but continuing the process, then it will be okay because this is the path that I am meant to be on. Realistically, the path that I continue to choose to be on.
I really am grasping my life and giving it a good shake.
And it’s empowering more than nerve wracking. But the nerves are there. So many unknowns.
Will I be at my school next year? Will I start my business by running my first workshops next year? Will I become a foster carer next year? Will I be successful? Will one happy?
What I do know is that life is incredibly short. And none of us know what tomorrow will bring or when we will take our last breath. And that it is our individual responsibility to be the best we can be and to live the best life we can live.
I feel that I am succeeding in trying.
Fear is not crippling me.
There is nothing wrong with being nervous or worried. If anything I think it shows that you have great character and truly want to provide the best for these children. Each child will be different and come with their own challenges, but I feel that having worked with kids in schools you will be uniquely qualified and experienced in figuring out a child’s needs. š
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. I think you are right. Time will tell x
LikeLiked by 1 person
Congratulations on your next big step in this process. I have a feeling 2016 is going to be a great year for you š
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hehe let’s hope so! How are you traveling?
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am okay, I am hoping 2016 is my year too. There’s lots going on with building a house and trying for babies and whatnot so I am hoping that 2016 works it all out for us.
Christmas is my favourite time of year because we get to see so much extended family so that is helping to combat stress from everything that is going on.
Interestingly I ran an experiment over the past month; I smiled more and whenever someone said something negative to me I either tried to provide a silver lining for them, support or responded positively (when people were bitching about change they didn’t want) and it made a big difference. Last night Hubby actually said how much he appreciates me and thanked me for being who I am. On the other side of things some people at work asked why I am always so happy and implied my happiness was medically assisted. I was pretty offended so replied, “oh you don’t need pills when you have Irish coffee” luckily the boss knows my humour haha.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol or alcohol š
Your experiment highlights how sad ppl are really and how they need to transfer that to others. It will be your year too next year. Good people never deserve to suffer or struggle for long. And it helps when you embrace rather than push away life too. Quite inspiring attitude!
ā¤ļø
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks. It is hard to do and I don’t always succeed, but I feel like it is the effort that counts too š
It was certainly an interesting experiment and made me realise how many negative people there are around. It made me want to visit Vanuatu again, I swear people smile there all the time. I came back with sore face muscles because you were always smiling in greeting at someone š
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hehe that’s what it was like in nepal too – people were just happy to be alive. That was enough.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sounds great right?!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes yes it does š
LikeLiked by 1 person
Very exciting! No doubt you’ll be an excellent carer xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanking you xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
I notice you less at my casa. Just wondering if my attitude is tiring for you?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lord no. Term4 at work is always so busy and I’m struggling to even post myself. I’m reading once a week and catching up in doses. Im also applying for other jobs and the applications take so long to write.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Phew. I forget that teachers are superhuman and their work never ends. I dunno how you do it. You’re amazing š
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nah lol exhausted. Hehe xxx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Take the compliment. You deserve it! xxx
LikeLiked by 1 person
š
LikeLiked by 1 person
No matter what challenges come up in being a foster carer you will succeed, you will find a way to deal with them and come up with a solution to the problem just like you always do. You will an amazing foster carer and any child will be lucky to be placed with you because the love you will share, the time and effort you will devote. You are one hell of a second mum to me and I know you will be the same if not better foster mum! You can do this, this is where you are suppose to be heading. It’s your next step in becoming whole. I know you can do this and I love you very very much šā¤ļø
LikeLiked by 1 person
And I love you š
LikeLiked by 1 person